{"id":32905,"date":"2026-05-11T16:54:50","date_gmt":"2026-05-11T16:54:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/jewishaction.com\/?p=32905"},"modified":"2026-05-11T16:54:50","modified_gmt":"2026-05-11T16:54:50","slug":"invisible-tribe-stories-of-strength-and-encouragement-for-children-coping-with-the-loss-of-a-parent","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jewishaction.com\/web-exclusive\/invisible-tribe-stories-of-strength-and-encouragement-for-children-coping-with-the-loss-of-a-parent\/","title":{"rendered":"Invisible Tribe: Stories of Strength and Encouragement for Children Coping With the Loss of a Parent"},"content":{"rendered":"

\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n

\"\"<\/a><\/p>\n

By Sara Miriam Gross<\/em><\/p>\n

Menucha Publishers<\/p>\n

New York, 2024<\/p>\n

240 pages<\/p>\n

Reviewed by Steve Lipman<\/strong><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Now an adult, mother, writer and writing coach who lives in Israel, Sara Miriam Gross became a member of the \u201cinvisible tribe\u201d when she was in first grade.<\/p>\n

\u201cInvisible tribe\u201d is her term for young boys and girls whose mother or father has died; these children are united by the loss they have suffered, which is not always visible to outsiders. Members of the group that they did not wish to join share common emotions, common sad feelings, common questions of will things ever be the same?<\/em><\/p>\n

Remembering how she felt when her father died, Gross wrote Invisible Tribe<\/em>, a collection of stories about kids mourning, coping and coming to terms with their new lives without Ima <\/em>or Abba.<\/em><\/p>\n

\u201cIt was my father\u2019s passing that put my life on fast-forward, got me thinking about things that no one else my age was contemplating, and ultimately enabled me to write Invisible Tribe<\/em>,\u201d she writes, \u201cthe book that I wish had been around when I was a kid.\u201d<\/p>\n

The book is clearly intended for the Orthodox community. It is respectful of frum <\/em>norms, describes Orthodox schools and camps, and employs Orthodox language. Parents are niftar; <\/em>they don\u2019t simply \u201cdie.\u201d<\/p>\n

The author\u2019s stories do not minimize or sugarcoat the degree of loss experienced by young children who have to deal with often-sudden, always-painful loss, and they do not offer Pollyannaish endings. Loss is still loss. <\/em>But Gross, undoubtedly drawing on her own life, tells of children\u2019s relationships with their friends, schoolmates, relatives and neighbors which help them through.<\/p>\n

\u00a0<\/em><\/p>\n

Steve Lipman is a frequent contributor to <\/em>Jewish Action.<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

\n

An interview with Sara Miriam Gross, author of Invisible Tribe<\/strong><\/p>\n

By Chaya Miriam Waintman<\/em><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chaya Miriam Waintman:<\/strong> How did you begin writing your book, Invisible Tribe<\/em>?<\/strong><\/p>\n

Sara Miriam Gross:<\/strong> I first began writing short stories for the newsletters of Links Family, an organization dedicated to helping children who have lost a parent. Eventually I had over six years\u2019 worth of stories, and I decided to compile them so that they would be available to any bereft child who wanted to read them in the future.<\/p>\n

CMW: What prompted you to take on this project?<\/strong><\/p>\n

SMG:<\/strong> I lost my father when I was seven, then I lost my grandmother a year after that. I wanted to help other children who also lost a parent by giving them stories that they could relate to, ones that brought them into the global community that I call our \u201cinvisible tribe.\u201d I wanted to write stories about the unique struggles of grieving children and about their everyday lives, too. But I wanted to do it in an uplifting way that gave them strength and made them smile. Dena Ackerman\u2019s playful illustrations definitely helped with that!<\/p>\n

CMW: <\/strong>What was the inspiration behind the stories? <\/strong><\/p>\n

SMG:<\/strong> All the stories are fictional, but the emotions and challenges in them are true. Some were inspired by other families, and some of them were inspired by my own experience. For instance, the story \u201cThe Youngest Yizkor,\u201d about a boy worried that he will be the youngest one in shul saying Yizkor, was drawn from my own memories, and the story \u201cCookies,\u201d about a boy who found some of his recently deceased mother\u2019s cookies in the freezer and nibbled away at them one by one, was inspired by an event in my own life after my grandmother passed away.<\/p>\n

CMW: <\/strong>What response have you seen to the book?<\/strong><\/p>\n

SMG:<\/strong> It\u2019s been a bigger response than I ever imagined. I think the book is most helpful to those between the ages of seven and thirteen who lost a parent, but I have gotten feedback from people in other stages of life, too. I recently received a message from a high school senior who said that she brings Invisible Tribe <\/em>along with her to school in her backpack to read at difficult moments. Widowed parents have told me that the book helped them better understand the loss from their children\u2019s point of view. Even parents who have lost a child have said that the book has helped their families, despite the fact that they\u2019re coping with the reverse situation.<\/p>\n

CMW: What is your hope for Invisible Tribe<\/em>?<\/strong><\/p>\n

SMG:<\/strong> My biggest hope for Invisible Tribe <\/em>is that soon it will no longer be needed! Until that day comes, I hope that the book will be a source of strength and comfort to all children who have lost a parent, and that it will help all of Klal Yisrael <\/em>become more sensitive to these children. I am also hoping to publish a Hebrew edition, so these supportive stories will be available to Israeli children as well.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Chaya Miriam Waintman is a daycare teacher living in Lakewood, New Jersey.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div>\n

 <\/p>\n

To reach out to the author of Invisible Tribe,\u00a0<\/em>email us at ja@ou.org.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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