{"id":7926,"date":"2013-05-23T14:03:19","date_gmt":"2013-05-23T14:03:19","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/jewishaction.com\/?p=7926"},"modified":"2020-07-27T08:18:08","modified_gmt":"2020-07-27T08:18:08","slug":"what-does-god-want-of-me-now-rabbi-yehuda-simes-courageous-journey","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/jewishaction.com\/jewish-world\/people\/what-does-god-want-of-me-now-rabbi-yehuda-simes-courageous-journey\/","title":{"rendered":"What Does God Want of Me Now? Rabbi Yehuda Simes\u2019 Courageous Journey"},"content":{"rendered":"

\"simes\"<\/a><\/b><\/p>\n

On the night of June 20th, 2010, a horrific car accident left Rabbi Yehuda Simes paralyzed from the neck down. Crushed by the ceiling of his minivan, he suffered a traumatic spinal cord injury. Had the lesion occurred just one millimeter lower, he wouldn\u2019t have made it.<\/p>\n

A popular rebbe<\/i> at Hillel Academy in Ottawa, Ontario at the time, Rabbi Simes is today not only making it, his spirit has emerged even stronger.<\/p>\n

Three years since that harrowing night, Ottawa\u2019s revered rebbe<\/i>, who is also dean and co-founder of Torah High Ottawa, NCSY\u2019s innovative Jewish studies program for public high school students, keeps defying the experts\u2019 expectations. Despite his quadriplegia, he breathes and swallows on his own, no longer relies on a feeding tube and continues to work diligently to increase his range of motion.<\/p>\n

More challenging than his daily physical therapy regimen is the daily struggle to remain optimistic and hopeful, which keeps Rabbi Simes working overtime on his emunah<\/i>. But Rabbi Simes is determined to ace every daunting \u201cquad moment\u201d (when he falters while attempting to do something he could easily do prior to the accident). His efforts appear to be paying off. Despite his dependence on a \u201cpower chair\u201d and 24\/7 homecare, Rabbi Simes considers his life blessed, and in the most important ways\u2014richer.<\/p>\n

\"Rabbi<\/a>

Rabbi Yehuda Simes and his wife, Shaindel<\/em>
Photo: Issie Scarowsky<\/em><\/p><\/div>\n

\u201cEvery person in this world has struggles,\u201d Rabbi Simes told a rapt audience of community members at Torah High Ottawa\u2019s fifth anniversary celebration in June 2011, twelve months after the accident. \u201cProblems make you stronger, more loving, more understanding. I firmly believe that everything God does is good. You look at me, and it doesn\u2019t look too good, and it doesn\u2019t feel too good, but it\u2019s good.\u201d<\/p>\n

Amid the family\u2019s painful new reality came moments of great joy. While Rabbi Simes was still in Ottawa Hospital\u2019s ICU, just a few floors away his wife, Shaindel, gave birth to a baby boy. The ICU and the birthing unit joined forces to make it possible for him to be there when his new son entered the world.<\/p>\n

Despite his dependence on a \u201cpower chair\u201d and 24\/7 homecare, Rabbi Simes considers his life blessed, and in the most important ways\u2014richer.<\/b><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

As soon as little Alter Chanoch Henoch was placed in his father\u2019s lap, Rabbi Simes recited the berachah<\/i> \u201chatov u\u2019meitiv<\/i>\u201d (God is good and does good). \u201cYou\u2019ve never seen a berachah<\/i> like that before,\u201d recalls Shaindel, who was seven months pregnant the night of the accident. \u201cWe were both bawling; the fact that this baby was born healthy and that my husband made it to the birth\u2014there was just so much to be thankful for.\u201d<\/p>\n

Despite the initial shock, tears and setbacks, Rabbi Simes won\u2019t allow himself the luxury of looking back. \u201cI could be negative, but I prefer to focus on the fact that this world is here to help us grow,\u201d he says. \u201cI don\u2019t think anyone should deny the suffering they have in their hearts, but then turn it into something positive. There is not an iota of doubt in my heart that this is what I need to be a better person. God puts each of us here to do the best we can with everything in our path. If God believes in me, than I have to believe in myself.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Rabbi<\/a>

Rabbi Yehuda Simes with his students at Torah High of Ottawa.<\/em>
Photo: Ottawa Jewish Bulletin<\/em><\/p><\/div>\n

Rabbi Simes views each day as a chance to start fresh, to start anew. \u201cWhen we wash al netilat yadayim<\/i> every morning, Hashem returns our souls to us; we are considered a new creation,\u201d he says. \u201cI just go forward.\u201d<\/p>\n

Shaindel admits that moving forward requires a lot of patience. \u201cFor a long time [after the accident] there was me, and there was \u2018my shadow,\u2019\u201d she says. \u201cI would show up at my daughter\u2019s Chumash party, a family Chanukah luncheon, my students\u2019 graduations, but didn\u2019t feel like I was really there. My brain told me, \u2018Be happy, your daughter is getting her Chumash today.\u2019 I smiled for the pictures, but didn\u2019t feel like it was me<\/i>.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n

Torah High Gets High Marks<\/b><\/p>\n

Rabbi Black maintains that even Torah High students who haven\u2019t made lifestyle changes are deeply affected by their exposure to genuine Torah learning. \u201cWe have seen success in students who didn\u2019t make changes in high school, yet go on to other outreach programs in university,\u201d says Rabbi Black.<\/p>\n

\u201cWe have two categories here, the \u2018practically frum<\/i>\u2019\u2014those who take on the mitzvot\u2014and the \u2018attitudinally frum<\/i>\u2019\u2014teenagers who acknowledge the value of observant Jewish life and would like to actually live it but are not supported at home. If you were to ask both types of kids what they want their Saturdays to look like in ten years, they would say they want it to look like Shabbat. These teens want to grow. The challenge is to help them maintain that desire.\u201d To that end, Torah High partners with the OU\u2019s Heshe & Harriet Seif Jewish Learning Initiative on Campus (JLIC), which places rabbinic couples to serve as Torah educators on local college campuses, as well as Aish HaTorah\u2019s Jerusalem Fellowship program, which takes university students to Israel each summer.<\/p>\n

Encouraged by the program\u2019s success, Rabbi Black aims to reach between 1,500 to 2,000 more teens per year, and to continue launching programs across North America and beyond. \u201cIf there\u2019s an opportunity to start another Torah High, we are 100 percent committed,\u201d says philanthropist Don Ghermezian from Riverdale, New York, who helped finance a few Torah Highs. \u201cI hope that Torah High will be mekarev <\/i>thousands of kids who otherwise would have no connection to Judaism. It is definitely proving it can.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"school\"<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Last spring, she experienced an unexpected emotional shift at her elder daughter\u2019s high school graduation\u2014the first public event she and her husband attended together since the accident. \u201cI felt focused and totally in the moment; I really enjoyed myself,\u201d says Shaindel. \u201cGranted, the scene looked a little different; instead of my husband walking beside me, he was in a wheelchair beside me. After the graduation, we went out for ice cream. To be sitting outside at ten o\u2019clock at night eating ice cream with the family was so normal, so real, so ourselves. We realized we could focus on ourselves as people<\/i> first. I\u2019ve come to a place of acceptance that I never thought I would come to two years ago.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rabbi Simes pushes himself to do more and depend on his wife less. \u201cIt was a huge milestone when I was able to use my right elbow to press the big button [on the wall] that opens up doors for wheelchairs,\u201d he says. \u201cTo actually go to an appointment by myself without an assistant doing that for me, it felt unbelievable, like total independence. Now I have to use that accomplishment to go even further.\u201dIndividuals from the community take turns coming to the Simes\u2019 home each day to help Rabbi Simes put on tefillin and get him his siddur. After that, Rabbi Simes says he\u2019s \u201cgood to go\u201d with his davening<\/i>, now that he is able to turn the pages on his own\u2014another triumph.<\/p>\n

Everyone\u2019s Pain\u2014Everyone\u2019s Growth
\n<\/b>Rabbi Simes and his wife attribute both the physical and spiritual gains to the constant flow of generosity and concern expressed by the Ottawa Jewish community. The day after the accident, community members organized a massive prayer service, as well as weekday and Shabbat meals, babysitters, household help and drivers for the family. The Simes family asked that individuals enhance their Shabbat observance as a merit for Rabbi Simes\u2019 recovery.<\/p>\n

His question is not \u201cWhy did this happen to me?\u201d Rather it\u2019s \u201cWhat does God want of me now?\u201d<\/b><\/p><\/blockquote>\n

Those who responded first to this request were Rabbi Simes\u2019 staunchest fans\u2014his students. \u201cI tried not turning on lights on Shabbat in his honor,\u201d says Abigail Freeman, twenty, a student at McGill University who attended Torah High Ottawa. \u201cHe\u2019s an amazing teacher; he didn\u2019t lecture. He asked our opinion and he always listened, valuing what we said.\u201d She made sure to visit him before going off to university. \u201cHe asked me about my summer and the college courses I would be taking. He was sitting in his wheelchair, not able to move, talking to me about me,<\/i>\u201d she says. \u201cThat was typical Rabbi Simes, always positive, caring about others, continuing his life as best he can with his belief in God and Judaism.\u201d<\/p>\n

Tobin Kaiman, twenty-four, another Torah High Ottawa graduate, currently serving in the IDF, concurs. \u201cMost people in his condition tend to fall into depression,\u201d he says. \u201cWatching him daven,<\/i> you could see how connected he is to God, before and after the accident. I would like to emulate that. If it weren\u2019t for Rabbi Simes, I wouldn\u2019t be on this [Torah-observant] path.\u201d<\/p>\n

Originally from St. Paul, Minnesota, Rabbi Simes, shy by nature, began his teaching career upon graduating from Yeshiva Chofetz Chaim of Queens, New York. He taught at Yeshiva Central Queens and at Yeshiva Tifereth Moshe, both in Queens.<\/p>\n

In 2002, Rabbi Simes and his family moved to Ottawa, following the Yeshiva\u2019s philosophy that a rebbe<\/i> \u201cshould serve as a big fish in a small pond.\u201d He quickly became one of Hillel Academy\u2019s most beloved teachers. His infectious passion for Judaism and his genuine love for every student earned him Ottawa\u2019s prestigious Grinspoon-Steinhardt Award for Excellence in Jewish Education in 2007, as well as the admiration of everyone he encountered.<\/p>\n

He\u2019s a master of communication,\u201d says Bram Bregman, executive director and co-founder of Torah High Ottawa. \u201cHe thinks about how the other person will hear his words. Every lesson is interactive, engaging and well-organized. Kids look forward to his classes. His teaching tenet is: if it\u2019s not working, it\u2019s not them; it\u2019s me.\u201d<\/p>\n

Moving Out\u2014Moving On
\n<\/b>As Rabbi Simes\u2019 daily schedule becomes more predictable, questions arise about how the new reality will affect the rest of the family (they have nine children, k\u201dah<\/i>). \u201cAfter the injury, we were all focused on healing my body,\u201d Rabbi Simes says. \u201cThey didn\u2019t think that much about the need to heal themselves,\u201d he says. \u201cThey had to come to an understanding about what this new life means for the entire family\u2014that it\u2019s their trauma as well. With everybody putting in the effort, my relationship with the children has become much more normalized. They have done wonderfully, beyond what anyone could have imagined.\u201d<\/p>\n

Their youngest child, who turned two in September, enjoys a very different kind of interaction with his father than his brothers and sisters had at his age. \u201cHis father can\u2019t pick him up, but he can sit on his Abba\u2019s lap and stroke his face and give him a hug,\u201d says Shaindel. \u201cWhen his Abba calls him over for a berachah<\/i> on Friday night, he comes running and holds his head just at the right position so that my husband can reach him. If my husband and I truly believe that this is what\u2019s supposed to be, then we are going to be okay with it. And if the children see that we\u2019re okay with it, then they will be too.\u201d<\/p>\n

This past July, the Simes family left their split-level home for a new, completely wheelchair-accessible house. \u201cEverything is on the first floor,\u201d says Shaindel. \u201cMy son asked me, \u2018You mean Abba can come in the kitchen?\u2019 He hadn\u2019t been in the kitchen for two years. We have an elevator to the basement, where he could give\u00a0shiurim<\/i>. And now we have room for exercise therapy machines. We felt\u00a0that we were on the brink of a new beginning.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"Rabbi<\/a>

Rabbi Yehuda Simes teaches his seventh grade class at the Ottawa Jewish Community School, formerly the Hillel Academy.<\/em>
Photo: Nicola Hamer\/Ottawa Jewish Bulletin<\/em><\/p><\/div>\n

Grateful to begin a \u201cnew chapter in their lives,\u201d Rabbi Simes has begun teaching again. He is also a guest speaker at Torah High Ottawa once a month. \u201cJust months ago, he was asking, \u2018What am I going to do now?\u2019\u201d says Shaindel, who has also returned to teaching at Torah Academy of Ottawa. \u201cWe don\u2019t take things for granted. Simple things take on so much more meaning. The kids had a function at school and we were able to go; I now cook for Shabbat. You have to really live each day and see that each one has its opportunities.\u201d<\/p>\n

\n

Just How Effective Is Torah High?
\n<\/b><\/p>\n

Recently, an independent study assessed the impact of Torah High programs, and found significant positive changes in students\u2019 attitudes and beliefs toward Judaism:<\/p>\n

\u2022\u00a0 60 percent of respondents were more inclined to date a Jewish man\/woman.
\n\u2022 64 percent of students said they were likely to get involved in Jewish life on campus.
\n\u2022\u00a0 Close to 70 percent of students felt more strongly about providing their future children with a Jewish education.
\n\u2022 More than 60 percent of students reported that since\u00a0 enrolling in Torah High, they are more likely to visit Israel.
\n\u2022 74 percent felt a greater connection to Torah and Torah values as a result of Torah High.<\/p>\n<\/div>\n

Rabbi Simes no longer speaks to his classes about the accident and how it affected him. \u201cThey can draw their own conclusions from what they see, which is pretty obvious,\u201d he says. \u201cIt\u2019s a huge challenge not to focus on myself, thinking about my own body. Once I started looking outward, I saw so much chizuk <\/i>around me; it\u2019s just up to us to find it.\u201d<\/p>\n

Rabbi Simes\u2019 bold attempts to reenter the world serve to intensify his relationship with God. \u201cI feel closer to Hashem, without a doubt\u2014much closer,\u201d he says. \u201cI\u2019m asking for His help more and more; it\u2019s tremendously calming. When davening<\/i> in the past, I focused on the difficulties. I now realize that there is a fine line between davening<\/i> for health and going overboard and thinking about it all the time; it impeded my moving forward. I feel siyata d\u2019Shmaya<\/i>; it\u2019s unbelievable how often He\u2019s there helping me.\u201d<\/p>\n

A number of months ago, while attending a Jewish Unity Live event, a community-wide Torah learning celebration run by JET (Jewish Education Through Torah) in Ottawa, Rabbi Simes learned that reentry into society doesn\u2019t necessitate putting one foot in front of the other. At the close of the evening, the participants got up to dance. \u201cI went in circles in my wheelchair and everyone stood around me clapping,\u201d\u00a0 Rabbi Simes says. \u201cI didn\u2019t like that; it shouldn\u2019t be about me. I joined the outside circle and by controlling the speed of my chair and maneuvering it to go along with the dancers, I participated. I am a person, not a quad.\u201d<\/p>\n

As he did before the accident, Rabbi Simes continues to reach out to help others. \u201cAny Jew who meets him\u2014from the most unaffiliated or even anti-Orthodox\u2014are inspired by him. He\u2019s such a kiddush Hashem<\/i>,\u201d says Bregman. \u201cIt\u2019s his kindness, the way he speaks to people with such understanding. He gets letters and e-mails from both Jews and non-Jews. His question is not \u2018Why did this happen to me?\u2019 Rather it\u2019s \u2018What does God want of me now?\u2019 That incredible attitude is what inspires others.\u201d<\/p>\n

Known for their guest-filled Shabbat table, the Simes couple look forward to opening their home again. \u201cWhen my husband made Kiddush for us for the first time since the accident, I felt like I was getting a glimpse of what the future could look like,\u201d says Shaindel. \u201cThere were times when I asked myself, is it worth the struggle?<\/i> But I knew I wouldn\u2019t go down without a fight. I was going to do whatever I could to make this work. My husband and I have a whole future ahead of us. And I\u2019m proud to be there beside him along this journey.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"The<\/a>

The couple with two of their children. The younger child seen above was born soon after the accident. Photo: Issie Scarowsky<\/em><\/p><\/div>\n

To listen to interviews with Rabbi Yehuda and Shaindel Simes, visit ou.org\/savitsky\/ysimes and http:\/\/ou.org\/savitsky\/simes.<\/i><\/p>\n

<\/i>Bayla Sheva Brenner is senior writer in the OU Communications and Marketing Department.<\/i><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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