In the quaint town of Merigold, nestled in the heart of the Mississippi Delta, Tobie Goldstein was born to parents who observed little in the way of Jewish tradition. As their only child, Tobie was cherished, but any Yiddishkeit she got only came during visits to her slightly more observant grandparents in Louisville, Kentucky.
Though Judaism was not a cornerstone of their own lives, Tobie’s parents knew she was destined for something greater. When they heard about a young rabbi teaching at the local day school in Louisville, fresh from studying at the prestigious Mir Yeshiva in Jerusalem, they urged Tobie to arrange a hasty visit to her grandparents and seek out an introduction.
That rabbi was the legendary Aryeh Kaplan, though at the time he was just a young scholar with a brilliant mind for both religion and science and an uncharted path before him. Eventually, he would become one of the preeminent Jewish thinkers and authors of our time with an extensive literary output. One day, he would inspire droves of unaffiliated Jewish teens and young adults through NCSY with his unique method for tapping into their inner pintele Yid, fanning the flames as they grew into something much brighter. But few know of the profound role his beloved wife played in helping shape his incredible legacy.
A Legend Takes Root
“My mother, who passed away last year, was the driving force behind everything my father accomplished and who he became,” said Micha, the fifth in Rabbi and Tobie Kaplan’s line of nine children and a devoted keeper of his parents’ story, especially his mother’s. “It was my mother who, early on in the marriage, decided to make Shabbos with guests an integral part of their marriage and a focus in our home.”
“My mother is the one who really set the tone,” continued Micha, “not just for my father but for our home and the lives we would all go on to lead.”
With Tobie’s steadfast support, Rabbi Kaplan went on to become one of the greatest interpreters of Jewish thought into English in modern times and a key figure in the 1970s teshuvah movement.
To try and eke out a living for their growing family, the Kaplans moved frequently—from Louisville to Maryland (where Rabbi Kaplan earned an advanced physics degree) to Iowa to Tennessee to Dover, New Jersey, and then Albany, New York. Finally, the family ended up in Boro Park, Brooklyn, where Tobie reveled being in the heart of Jewish life and where she further anchored her young family in a structured and strong framework of religious Judaism.
But the family struggled financially. “My father wore the same sweater for twenty-five years to the point where it had visible holes,” recalled Micha. “I remember walking to school in the snow with worn-out shoes, too. But my mother had simple needs, and money wasn’t important to her. Her values lay elsewhere.”
“Having an open home teeming with guests was one of my mother’s biggest priorities,” said Tobie’s daughter, Abby Rosenfeld. “Since she grew up as an only child, she was determined to always be surrounded by people. She had nine children, and she always had as many guests as possible for Shabbos.”
The Kaplan home also had a constant influx of devoted followers who never missed a shiur; they were drawn to Rabbi Kaplan’s effortless ability to convey the most complex ideas in a straightforward way.
My mother was the driving force behind everything my father accomplished and who he became.
“My father would hold classes in the house, and I remember my mother’s valiant efforts to try and keep all the kids quiet,” remembered Micah. “It couldn’t have been easy, but she always encouraged my father’s Torah pursuits.”
One regular attendee of Rabbi Kaplan’s in-house shiurim was Yitta Halberstam, journalist and author of the Small Miracles series. “I remember Tobie as a very warm and hospitable woman with the most charming Southern accent,” recalled Yitta. “She clearly gave her husband a lot of latitude to devote himself to the tzibbur (community), and she seemed perfectly comfortable and very proud that he was involved with inspiring and helping so many people.”
Abby elaborates on Micha’s earlier point about her mother’s reverence for Shabbos.
“My mother did not have a lot of material possessions, but she received a set of silver candlesticks as a gift and she treated them with extraordinary devotion, cleaning them regularly,” recounted Abby. “They were central to her Shabbos experience.”
Despite the constant flurry of children and guests, Abby remembered, her mother remained calm. “She was never frazzled or uptight while preparing for Shabbos,” said Abby. “One of my most cherished memories is making challah with her every Friday morning.” Because Abby made challah with her mother weekly, she was able to effortlessly recite the recipe by heart to her amazed teacher in the second grade who asked about the delicious bread Abby had brought to share with her class.
A Legacy Flourishes
It was during this time living in Boro Park that Rabbi Kaplan was recruited to work for NCSY by Rabbi Pinchas Stolper, who came across his writing in a journal for Orthodox Jewish scientists and was immediately taken with Rabbi Kaplan’s extraordinary writing style.
Beyond his in-person influence, Rabbi Kaplan had a remarkable literary output, having written ten hugely influential books for NCSY exploring Judaism’s foundational principles and central mitzvot. In addition, he authored a series of booklets refuting the teachings of Christian missionaries intent on luring Jews into messianic “Judaism” at the time. He also served as editor of the OU’s Jewish Life, the predecessor to Jewish Action, in 1974.
Family members of Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan at the launch of the NCSY Aryeh Kaplan Library in 2021. Left to right: Ayala Kaplan (Micha’s wife), Esther Malka and Goldie Eisig (grandchildren), Rochel Eisig, Abby Rosenfeld, Rebbetzin Tobie Kaplan, a”h, Shimon Kaplan, Ruven Kaplan, Micha Kaplan, Rabbi Dovid Bashevkin (director of education for NCSY), and Rabbi Micah Greenland (international director of NCSY). Photo: Kruter Photography
In fact, Rabbi Kaplan became the preeminent writer in the world of English-language Judaica. His prolific body of work includes The Handbook of Jewish Thought, The Living Torah and translations of obscure Kabbalistic texts like the Bahir and Sefer Yetzirah. All were written in Rabbi Kaplan’s unique voice demonstrating intellectual rigor and a deep understanding of how to illuminate complex concepts for the masses.
A force in the kiruv movement, Rabbi Kaplan was a popular speaker and a regular keynote at NCSY events where teens found him, despite his brilliance, both approachable and relatable.
“Throughout history, Jews have always been observant,” Rabbi Kaplan once stated in an interview. The teshuvah movement is just a normalization. The Jewish people are sort of getting their act together. We’re just doing what we’re supposed to do.”
But, emphasize his children, Rabbi Kaplan would have never become so prominent in the growing kiruv movement or been such a prolific writer had Tobie not taken the reins of running their home and raising their children, serving as a behind-the-scenes pillar of strength, wisdom and quiet devotion.
“When my brother Ruven was just three weeks old, my mother insisted my father go to an NCSY convention that was scheduled,” said Abby, citing an example of her mother’s selflessness. “My mother also spent many a night proofreading my father’s words. He greatly respected her input and ideas.”
Rabbi Kaplan died from a heart attack at forty-eight years old. It was 1983, and Tobie, who was not yet forty years old, was left with nine children to raise. She soon married Yeshaya Seidenfeld, who took on her children as his own in addition to the three from his previous marriage.
Although in a better financial position at this point, said her daughter, Rochel Eisig, Tobie remained a simple, low-maintenance person who had no interest in anything “gashmiyus.”
“It was my father’s entire library of sefarim that were among her most prized possessions,” said Rochel. “She let people borrow them, but it was extremely important that they be returned.”
“My mother had an encyclopedic knowledge of every sefer in the house, so much so that I once visited and came home to my wife getting a call from my mother, asking if I took a certain sefer she noticed was not in its place,” recounted Micha. “She might not have known how to speak Hebrew, but she imbibed the words anyways. During the Covid-19 pandemic, one of my nephews came to her home to learn every day, just so she could hear him learning and absorb the pages of Gemara.”
In 2021, NCSY celebrated Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan’s legacy with the launch of the NCSY Aryeh Kaplan Library, a reissuing of the entire Kaplan opus. Photo: Kruter Photography
Her other most cherished treasures? Her children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren, each of whom was special and unique in her eyes, said one of her closest friends, Annie Weiss. “Tobie didn’t care about anything as much as her family,” said Annie. “She was always there for them, whatever they needed, through good times and bad, just an excellent and devoted mother and grandmother. It’s just beautiful to see the family she created.”
When Tobie passed away last April at age eighty-two, she left behind over 150 grandchildren and great-grandchildren, all of whom are deeply devoted and observant Jews today.
A new generation of young people are now embracing Rabbi Kaplan’s works, which NCSY reissued in 2021.
“Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan’s capacity to help people find a home within Yiddishkeit and in Jewish life, which was his life’s work, is undoubtedly a testament to the home he and his wife, Tobie, built together,” said Rabbi Dovid Bashevkin, NCSY’s director of education, who spent two years editing the collection of Rabbi Kaplan’s writings.
As Rabbi Kaplan’s legacy continues to live on and inspire people to dive deeper into Judaism, it’s time that people recognize the woman who not only made this legacy possible but who beautifully inhabited the often unseen yet indispensable role of those who stand behind great leaders—not merely supporting their journey but shaping it in the most profound ways.
Tova Cohen is a fundraising communications professional and college essay coach. She lives in New Jersey with her family.
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The Editor’s View by Rabbi Aryeh Kaplan (Jewish Life, Spring 1974 )