In her new book, Choosing to Be Chosen: From Being an Atheist Non-Jew to Becoming an Orthodox Jew (Wicked Son, 2026), Kylie Ora Lobell details her conversion process and tells her story.
The following excerpt from the book is about Lobell’s first exposure to Shabbat, attending Friday night dinner with her boyfriend’s family.
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When the sun went down, Shabbat started. Danny’s siblings and his parents’ friends started pouring into the dining room for supper. His mom, dad, grandparents, three brothers, and Jordana and her family were there. Danny explained what was going on with the prayers at the meal.
“We sing ‘Shalom Aleichem,’ which means ‘peace be upon you,’ to welcome in the Shabbat angels,” he whispered to me. “It sets the tone for the week. If you have a calm Shabbat, the idea is you’ll have a calm week. It brings good vibes into your home.”
Courtesy of Kylie Ora Lobell
I liked the idea of marking the beginning of the new week, which I learned happened on Saturday night after Shabbat was over. The Jewish days started at night, since the Torah said that G-d created nighttime before He created daytime. Acknowledging and honoring a new week gave more meaning to the idea of time.
Instead of going, going, going, you could stop to acknowledge the passing of time and take a nice break. I thought it could be good for me to slow down a bit, since I was always going a million miles per hour, and my head was racing with anxious thoughts all the time.
Following “Shalom Aleichem,” Danny’s father sang “Eshet Chayil” to Danny’s mom. It translated to “A Woman of Valor.” I read how wives worked hard for their families and how their husbands and children would praise them. Husbands sang this to their wives every week to let them know how much they appreciated them.
When “Eshet Chayil” was over, Danny’s father got up, placed his hands on Danny’s head, and blessed him. He then kissed Danny’s head and did the same for each of [Danny’s] three younger brothers. After that, he said the prayer for wine, and we all got up and washed our hands and said a blessing to eat challah. We weren’t allowed to talk between washing our hands and eating the challah, so everyone was quiet around the table.
And then, once we ate our bread and could talk again, the table exploded in lively conversation, with everyone talking over each other and asking about their week.
Danny’s mom served delicious chicken soup, a Friday night tradition, along with salads, followed by potatoes, vegetables, rice, and a large roast chicken.
The meal seemed to go on forever. I ate so much that I thought my stomach was going to pop. Danny’s mom brought out three desserts, and I couldn’t resist.
She served something called Turkish delight and fruit salad and fresh mint tea. I hadn’t tasted food like this before. It all seemed very exotic.
Dinner was over around midnight. . . .
“I’m so full,” I said, staring up at the ceiling, clutching my stomach.
“Welcome to Judaism,” Danny said.
Excerpted with permission from Choosing to be Chosen: From Being an Atheist Non-Jew to Becoming an Orthodox Jew by Kylie Ora Lobell (Wicked Son, 2026).